Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
