just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
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