i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
