nut hugger
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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