It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
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