Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Randomize
