I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
