What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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