if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize