Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
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