it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
We need to get me chipped asap
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
