EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
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