he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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