Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize