I'm going to rape someone's good day.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I think a kid would responsible me up
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
