okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
