it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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