No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
