We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
