Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize