HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
