You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
