No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
