You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize
