I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
