That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I wish I could teleport
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
