Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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