I am puke
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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