Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Randomize
