We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I understand Curling. That high.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
