I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Randomize
