Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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