she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
He did a backflip because drugs
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
