I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize