Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
