made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize