because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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