i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
