This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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