I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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