Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
