I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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