I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
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