The maid of honor just puked.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
