one two three fourrrrnication!
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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