I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
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