when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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