Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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