You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Randomize
