I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
