I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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