Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
The air was thick with penises
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
